Okay, I lied...one more post before I begin :) The two entries I just posted came from a special I did on another blog called "Religion Week", where I wrote exclusively about religion for an entire week. Since the blog is usually political and philosophical, I began by discussing politicized religious issues like abortion, homosexuality, and the teaching of evolution. Then I analyzed several atheist videos I'd found online in order to debunk what I viewed as logical fallacies or historical inaccuracies therein. And finally, I concluded with those two posts to express my thoughts on what God is, rather than what God isn't. I was proud of the depth of thought included in the weeks writings, and contentedly moved on to other topics.
That was almost exactly one year ago. Over that time, I've gone to church often, prayed often, and had several more "God moments". But what I haven't done is make a consistent effort to apply God's messages. My religion week touched on deeper subjects than most Christians ever consider, but it fell short in the sense that I didn't keep thinking those things, and didn't remind myself to act accordingly in my daily life. On a blog that dealt mostly with politics, I treated religion the same as I'd treat any of my political opinions: a controversial issue that you could have "all figured out", express your thoughts, and then move on to the next thing.
But that's not what being a Christian is about. On issues like "how high should taxes be?" or "should marijuana be legal?", that approach works. You can express your opinion, and then once you've gotten it off your chest, you're done. The holder of a belief as comparably trivial as a political opinion has no further responsibility for action once his position has been articulated. But with faith, you can't just say it; you have to live it. Christianity isn't just an opinion, it's a way of life. It isn't just a series of premises that you either accept or reject as you would an argument in a formal debate, but rather a way of thinking, a foundation upon which all your other thoughts should build off of. My blog posts tried to address it as a "one and done" deal, instead of a lifelong process. Even though I stand by the content of those posts, my approach was off the mark.
When I was on my mission trip in Guatemala, lots of the people there would ask me to share my "testimonial". "When did you accept Jesus Christ as your personal Savior and Lord?" they'd ask. "When were you saved?" I wouldn't know how to answer those questions, because that's not the perspective I'm used to. To some people, God reveals himself all at once in a dramatic, sudden, life-altering epiphany. But I don't think that's the case for most Christians. It certainly wasn't for me. To me, discovering God, understanding his Word, and accepting the fundamental tenets of our faith was a much more gradual process. I can't cite a specific date, or even a specific year, where it all just suddenly clicked. My testimony wasn't much of a story, because it lacked a plot! And although there are absolutely many times when I'm just in awe of God's vast universe, I'm hesitant to place too much retroactive significance on those moments just so I can tell the world that THAT, definitively, was THE MOMENT that I was saved.
The point is, your understanding of God never stops growing, and your faith never stops deepening. To pick any one particular unit of growth as the one in which you're "sufficiently Christian" is kind of silly to me. Belief doesn't have to be absolute, it can come in degrees. When I posted my series of religion blogs last year, I tried to lay out my faith as a set of absolute opinions, rather than as an ever-growing perspective that I would add to with daily practice. And when born-again Christians ask fellow believers to tell a story about "how" they were saved, they put undo pressure on people to retroactively remember things differently than they actually were, or to condense the complex conclusions derived from many years of prayer and rumination into a neat, easily explainable story line of events.
How does this relate to the book I'll start reading tomorrow? I suppose it's just a rather long, roundabout way of explaining my approach to this project. God hasn't communicated his message to me in grand epiphanies before, and although anything is possible, I don't expect him to do so now. Whatever I learn from this beautiful book may not always be clear as soon as I've finished - it may take awhile to sink in. It may require a second or third reading to fully understand, and I may understand it only in degrees, rather than all at once. There may be some days when I'm too tired, distracted, or preoccupied to fully hear what God's trying to tell me at that moment. I'm only human. Similarly, the opinions I express in the immediate aftermath of my reading may not be the same as the opinions I wind up with several years from now. When I'm all finished, I may not be as inspired and clearheaded as I'd imagined I'd be when I decided to take on the project. I may be confused or conflicted. I have no idea what awaits me, so I'm not going to set out some mold that I have to fit beforehand. All I can do is read it, think about it, and then live it. The rest is up to God.
That was almost exactly one year ago. Over that time, I've gone to church often, prayed often, and had several more "God moments". But what I haven't done is make a consistent effort to apply God's messages. My religion week touched on deeper subjects than most Christians ever consider, but it fell short in the sense that I didn't keep thinking those things, and didn't remind myself to act accordingly in my daily life. On a blog that dealt mostly with politics, I treated religion the same as I'd treat any of my political opinions: a controversial issue that you could have "all figured out", express your thoughts, and then move on to the next thing.
But that's not what being a Christian is about. On issues like "how high should taxes be?" or "should marijuana be legal?", that approach works. You can express your opinion, and then once you've gotten it off your chest, you're done. The holder of a belief as comparably trivial as a political opinion has no further responsibility for action once his position has been articulated. But with faith, you can't just say it; you have to live it. Christianity isn't just an opinion, it's a way of life. It isn't just a series of premises that you either accept or reject as you would an argument in a formal debate, but rather a way of thinking, a foundation upon which all your other thoughts should build off of. My blog posts tried to address it as a "one and done" deal, instead of a lifelong process. Even though I stand by the content of those posts, my approach was off the mark.
When I was on my mission trip in Guatemala, lots of the people there would ask me to share my "testimonial". "When did you accept Jesus Christ as your personal Savior and Lord?" they'd ask. "When were you saved?" I wouldn't know how to answer those questions, because that's not the perspective I'm used to. To some people, God reveals himself all at once in a dramatic, sudden, life-altering epiphany. But I don't think that's the case for most Christians. It certainly wasn't for me. To me, discovering God, understanding his Word, and accepting the fundamental tenets of our faith was a much more gradual process. I can't cite a specific date, or even a specific year, where it all just suddenly clicked. My testimony wasn't much of a story, because it lacked a plot! And although there are absolutely many times when I'm just in awe of God's vast universe, I'm hesitant to place too much retroactive significance on those moments just so I can tell the world that THAT, definitively, was THE MOMENT that I was saved.
The point is, your understanding of God never stops growing, and your faith never stops deepening. To pick any one particular unit of growth as the one in which you're "sufficiently Christian" is kind of silly to me. Belief doesn't have to be absolute, it can come in degrees. When I posted my series of religion blogs last year, I tried to lay out my faith as a set of absolute opinions, rather than as an ever-growing perspective that I would add to with daily practice. And when born-again Christians ask fellow believers to tell a story about "how" they were saved, they put undo pressure on people to retroactively remember things differently than they actually were, or to condense the complex conclusions derived from many years of prayer and rumination into a neat, easily explainable story line of events.
How does this relate to the book I'll start reading tomorrow? I suppose it's just a rather long, roundabout way of explaining my approach to this project. God hasn't communicated his message to me in grand epiphanies before, and although anything is possible, I don't expect him to do so now. Whatever I learn from this beautiful book may not always be clear as soon as I've finished - it may take awhile to sink in. It may require a second or third reading to fully understand, and I may understand it only in degrees, rather than all at once. There may be some days when I'm too tired, distracted, or preoccupied to fully hear what God's trying to tell me at that moment. I'm only human. Similarly, the opinions I express in the immediate aftermath of my reading may not be the same as the opinions I wind up with several years from now. When I'm all finished, I may not be as inspired and clearheaded as I'd imagined I'd be when I decided to take on the project. I may be confused or conflicted. I have no idea what awaits me, so I'm not going to set out some mold that I have to fit beforehand. All I can do is read it, think about it, and then live it. The rest is up to God.
No comments:
Post a Comment